Day 7, The One Word Challenge: Observation

Standard

To love thyself is to recognize what you have been given, your gifts and how they can be used to benefit giving Glory to the Creator, and discovering your true purpose in this life. 

In order to love others you must first love thyself. As you go upon your journey, you will come to find that your love will only grow and continue to set a fire in your heart allowing you to recognize love’s infinite possibilities!

Don’t Confuse your path…

Standard

Life is a long journey.  We have paths that we take all the time.  Some more brutal than others.  You might consider transitions to be these paths where either you know you are walking into a hell-storm or it’s the calming before the storm or even just a beautiful walk in the park…I would like to have more of these please!  🙂  These periods of storm and peacefulness in contrast, are life in its purest form.

Nothing will be perfect, ever.  You can plan all you want and those plans will always change.  Choose to be flexible.  Choose to look past your current storm or transition and see the hope of a rainbow at the end.  If we focus on the dirt or pain of the moment, we lose sight of what is most important: survival.  This too shall pass.  Keep your chin up, keep persevering…stand a little taller and trust a little deeper.  Where ever you are at in your journey, embrace it.  Make the most of it and learn all you can from it.  Don’t let your  lack of sight through the downpour stop you…just keep going!

Today, “Don’t confuse your path with your destination.  Just because it’s stormy now doesn’t mean you aren’t headed for sunshine.”  -Unknown

❤ The CatMan

What’s it Gonna Be?

Standard

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X8wO-b95z14

Today, I was in the car driving and one of my favorite En Vogue songs ever.  This one just kind of gets the hamster wheels a going and makes you think “poop or get off the pot”.  Since February I have been dealing with a ton of emotional pieces and changes.  I also recently had a friend call me out stone cold on something that I needed to change about myself.  Here is kind of how it went down.

Over the past months I have been discerning some additions to my already overflowing gift basket of qualities.  I have been considering going back to school in August for hair.  I dealt with an emotional break-up…still hurt, I need to address some aspects of myself that I have to change.  It is apparent that the hurt is still very fresh and there; however those who have hurt me are not so understanding of why I have such emotions and negativity.  I turned into a busy body.  I have also turned into a short fuse.  The fuse tends to go off at those I love the most.  Which haha…well it was my dad 2 weeks ago and Nomad earlier this week.  That is not good.  This person called me out big time and then I said somethings that I really didn’t mean.  They pushed further out because they took it personally and they just didn’t want to deal with it.  I know I am not perfect, but I know darn well that I am trying my hardest to get to where I need to be.  I have a plan and goals…but in the process of getting there I need for this hurt to be addressed as not to fuse out on certain people anymore.

I don’t want you thinking that I only spoke hurtful things because I didn’t.  I said some very honest things too.  These things he needed to hear as much as I needed to hear what he said to me.  He is completely right as well as I was, but even after apology he wont own up to it being HIS fault I am hurting.  He has nothing to say about that.  I cannot change that either.  Unless someone is willing to say, “hey I am sorry for treating you as bad just months back!”  the hurt will always remain.  Maybe it isn’t in the cards for us to be friends at this point or ever.

It is a hard thing to realize that you are ONLY in control of yourself and YOUR journey.  This is a hard thing for me to understand, but I am getting there.  I am coming around slowly.  In my mind, I would want someone to warn me if they thought I was in the wrong or headed down a path of self-destruction.  Apparently not everyone wants that kind of warning.  I think true friends understand that warning system.

How does a friendship move past these little explosions and get on to having a loving relationship?  How is this possible if both hurt parties keep pushing the other away and the misunderstandings still stand?  Both of us are under stress but still is no excuse to walk out…I don’t care what anyone says, that is so not right.  Anyone have any suggestions?  I guess only time can tell…

In the end, the only bridge to understanding greater is to invite others to share their stories with us.  Some tend to share sporadically and others need the verbal invite to feel like you need them to be apart of their life.  I need to lay my ego down.  I need to also lay my pride down…and just keep focused.  I need to pray more.  I need to realistically get these goals accomplished and move the stones, rocks, and mountains God needs me to move!  I think I owe it to myself anyways.

Interesting thought, huh?  No excuses…

I vow to stop making excuses and start living my life.  I need to remain grounded and keep on making headway…Keep going little CatMan….

What’s your number?

Standard

So how many frogs are you supposed to kiss before you are finally given a prince?  How many butt heads (being polite for the little ears in the audience) do you have to go through before you finally give up?  Well the verdict is still out.  I presume this number…this fancy little integer…this nagging little in your face number about how a woman is supposed to conduct her love life is just dumb.  I said it.  I might be so bold as to say there is no such thing as one magic number which predicts the time and person you will fall in love with BECAUSE may I be so bold AGAIN to say (just in case you didn’t hear the first time), sometimes it simply just happens!

How many times do we have to be subjected to the pressure of finding Mr. Right when the expectations are such that we lose sight of who the heck we are?!  It is preposterous!  Why as a woman should I ever lose sight for one moment of who I am or what my goals are….or doing what I love because some stupid rules from society says so?  Who says I have to wear my fancy couture dress, always say please and thank you, cross my legs and always smile….and not to mention, mind my matters OH WAIT AND LOOK PERFECT ALL THE EFFING (again censoring for the little ears…this is Lent you know!) TIME!  How are we ever to find Mr. Right when we forget the very basics of who we are?  When we lose who we are, that is really when we find ourselves on a bumpy, curvy, and maybe even scary part of this journey of ours…

I used to think that you had to act a certain way to get a guy to notice you.  That is simply not the case.  Just be yourself, perfection and flaws they are you!  You were made with all of that already thought of and the Big Guy knew what He was doing…so you might as well embrace it because you are only going to get better the more you understand and know yourself.  Decide what you want and go get it girl!  You deserve the world and there is nothing but opportunities knocking….and if their aren’t the opportunities then maybe you need to consider a change.

We should stop trying to act like everyone else.  Stop trying to be something you aren’t and just be yourself.  LOVE yourself.  You cannot love another until you love yourself first.  Simply love.  That alone is an accomplishment.

Once you learn that it is alright to be a size ten and have 10-1/2 sized shoes, or be a size 2 with nothing but skin on…short, tall, big, small….it doesn’t matter because it is all yours!  You are make just as you are for so much purpose.  Discover everything about you that is wonderful and I guarantee someone will notice.  cough cough…OK EVERYONE is going to notice.

It doesn’t take a magic number to figure that out.  It takes figuring out how to love and appreciate ourselves and the rest will soon follow.  No magic number.  No societal rules saying this is how you find “Mr. Right”. AND definitely no set formula to win “him” over whomever he is.  That part will happen as natural as the sun rising.

Believe in yourself.  Love and appreciate yourself as you are right now and everything you CAN be.  Go get it girl…this is all yours!

❤ CatMan

Carry your candle…

Standard

So, I have decided today was kind of blah.  I got a few things done (cough 2 projects!) and then I was done.  A rough Monday if you will.

This past weekend was filled with interesting happenings.  First off, I think as we all have specific energy that helps gravitate others either away or toward us.  It’s almost like seeing people of light and of dark in a sense.  For me, I tend to attract some pretty cool people but, they might not necessarily be anyones first choice.  I love them!  Those are the people who make things happen.  For an instance, on Friday night when I was getting my nails done, Nicki was the name of the woman who took care of me.  She was going thru some guy issues.  I could tell she had something on her mind, so I asked.  Sometimes, people just need you to ask!   We had an at length conversation about boyfriends, marriage…etc.  🙂  She had a dim light because of all the crap she was going thru…but I guarantee once she eliminates that–she will be in good shape!

Next, my friend Katherine and I ate dinner at a restaurant that has really good sweet tea.  We walked in, out of the cold, and had a delightful time.  I am sure people thought we might be sauced because both of us together are all giggles and politeness.  🙂  Then the manager came around to check on us and we struck up a conversation about his situation!  He was planning a wedding with his 24-year-old fiancée and so we were drilling him on that!  How great…then out of no where he asked me if I wanted a gallon of sweet tea!  UH HECK YES I DO!  My inner child was just jumping for joy!  Best part being I got it for free.

The attraction just kept coming thru the last part of our night at Karaoke.  While we were up singing, the table right in front of us participated in our singing antics.  We were energetic, and just having a blast.  AND the one that I had a connection to was named Gopher.  He was a regular.  We talked about everything.  Literally.  He probably gave me the biggest complement ever that night.  He told me that the reason why I could carry a conversation on with anyone about anything was because I was secure with in myself.  That means this stranger could see what progress I made in the last 2 years.  That is huge.  His light too burned brightly.  So did the stage lights though….

OH my did I feel like such a Rock Star up there!   “DON’T STOP BEELLLLIEEVVING…..HOLD ON TO THAT FEEELLLING!  STREET LIGHTS, PEOPPLLLE!”  (excerpt from Journey-Don’t Stop believing)  By the end of the night, we were dancing on tables and singing at the top of our lungs!  I never thought that would be possible but OH yes it was!  We ended up closing the bar down.

Well on Saturday, it was all about my Special Olympic athletes.  🙂  Totally had Bowling State!  Everyone did so well.  There were 13 athletes that competed.  We had two athletes place first and it was super awesome.  There is just something so special about them.  You could see the nervous looks on their faces as well as succeeding…it is one thing you can just never replace.  I think the coolest thing that happened though on Saturday was when an athlete from another team got a strike.  She ran and gave me a hug!  I just hugged her right back but how precious is that?

I think that if you really think about things and about how we all connect, you might be more inclined to let your light shine a little brighter.  Deal with the situations you are given, take a lesson from each and move on!  Those who understand, will always support you.

Visualize:  A dark world with little specks of light scattered around it, some brightly burning and others dark as night.  Imagine if the specks gravitated toward one another.  What a bold visual!  What if then the semi bright ones also reflected in the darkness and made them bright too?  What a beautiful bright world this would be.  Let us strive for that kind of world today!

 

Carry your candle 🙂

 

 

Peace and Love,

CatMan

Party Animals!

Standard

This weekend was full of mischief and fun.  In leu of Thanksgiving, my friends had a get-together.  It ended up being a great feast.  We all got our best dishes together, drinks of choice, and all while wearing our “business casual”.  It was amazing.  This time the men were in the kitchen while the girls were sitting down relaxing.  It was great.

I was really proud of the boys for all they did to put this celebration on….it was quite the deal!  We all arrived between 4 and the time to which we were scheduled to eat (7pm).  From there, everything escalated!

Dinner was great.  Who am I kidding?  Dinner was great!  After dinner we all played games and danced and drank the night away.  I just wanted to say, for the record, that I behaved myself…but, my lovely friends well….can’t say they did the same.  There were games where I got to wear a Referee jersey and break up the fights.  I also got to sit and laugh at their stupidity.  I even had one friend tell me that if he thought eventually we–meaning he and I–would get together.  Ha I just laughed!  They are regular party animals.

I do love to laugh and my boys always know how to make me laugh until the tears roll….  The night continued to go on as the boys begun to blare the music (Journey mind you!) and proceeded to dance on tables.  What dorks?!  They looked like drunk sailors stumbling on the coffee tables…It was something out of a bad 80’s movie! They danced, sang and drank until about 3am in the morning.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kq5HBSlgI00 The party was still going on loud and proud until I left.

One thing about these boys is that I can only handle them in little doses.  They are fabulous in little spurts.  They can be sweet but then, after a whole night of harassment….it is enough for another 10 years.  They can cook, they can drink and boy they can be weirdos but when it comes down to it they have good hearts and good intentions (most of the time).  The mean well.

Let me ask you all something…what is the most ridiculous thing your friends have done?   It seems like my dears are always doing something crazy but, that is what keeps me laughing and life moving on!  🙂

Keep your head up and keep on pressing forward whether you’re a party animal or not! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CmrOB_q3tjo&feature=branded